People · Collection guide · 5 stops
Stop living for approval
Use this path when other people’s approval is shaping choices you would rather make for yourself. Begin with belonging and status, then consider creative conviction, being misunderstood and the identities you defend. Finish with a contrasting artist’s voice; independence should leave room to listen as well as disagree.
Browse this collection in reading order →Suggested routes through material saved to explore. I haven’t read or watched everything here yet. The order and prompts are editorial suggestions based on available source text, excerpts, descriptions and synopses; they are not personal ratings or claims of completed viewing.
Recognise the invitation to belong
Lewis’s Inner Ring examines the desire to get inside an exclusive circle. Start with the social pull itself, rather than assuming approval seeking is simply a lack of confidence.
Pause & try
Name a group whose acceptance matters to you. What do you find yourself doing, hiding or agreeing with to stay close to it?
Protect the reason for making something
Videos · Est. 1 min
David Bowie - On Why You Should Never Play To The Gallery →
Collected by The Unintuitive ↗
Bowie’s advice about playing to the gallery narrows the question to creative work. It gives you a way to ask what you wanted from a project before an imagined audience entered the room.
Pause & try
Describe what interests you about one project without mentioning praise, visibility or how impressive it would look.
Allow other people an incomplete view
Kreider’s essay examines the discomfort of what others think of us. Follow the creative prompt with this social one: doing something for your own reasons does not guarantee that everyone will understand them.
Pause & try
Choose one harmless misunderstanding you can leave uncorrected. What useful activity could receive the energy you would spend managing that impression?
Keep conviction from becoming a costume
Graham’s essay supplies a counterweight to declaring yourself independent. A strongly defended identity can also narrow your thinking, even when the identity is ‘someone who does not follow the crowd’.
Pause & try
What evidence could change your mind about one belief attached to your identity? Write it down before seeking another argument in its favour.
Listen to a particular artistic voice
The Miles Davis interview brings these ideas into an artist’s account of his work and world. Read for specific judgments and experiences, including points you resist, rather than collecting a ready-made model of rebellion.
Pause & try
Identify one judgment you understand better after reading and one you still question. Can you state both without needing either total agreement or rejection?
After the five stops
Take it into your own life.
Make one modest decision according to your own stated reason. Ask for feedback from someone whose judgment is relevant, and decide in advance what kind of feedback would actually change your approach. Approval and useful information do not have to carry the same weight.
Continue exploring
Items 1–5 are the guided route above. The remaining items are listed alphabetically below; choose what interests you next. These numbers match the collection shelf.
- Anton Kreil - Respect Money & Be Indifferent Towards It → Find on the shelf: Anton Kreil - Respect Money & Be Indifferent Towards It →
- Becoming the person who does the thing → Find on the shelf: Becoming the person who does the thing →
- Crumb → Find on the shelf: Crumb →
- High Agency in 30 minutes - George Mack → Find on the shelf: High Agency in 30 minutes - George Mack →
- Hunter S. Thompson’s Letter on Finding Your Purpose and Living a Meaningful Life → Find on the shelf: Hunter S. Thompson’s Letter on Finding Your Purpose and Living a Meaningful Life →
- Hunter Thompson profile → Find on the shelf: Hunter Thompson profile →
- John McAfee Wild Interview → Find on the shelf: John McAfee Wild Interview →
- Off the Grid with Thomas Massie → Find on the shelf: Off the Grid with Thomas Massie →
- Peter Thiel - Original Thinking → Find on the shelf: Peter Thiel - Original Thinking →
- Social Status: Down the Rabbit Hole → Find on the shelf: Social Status: Down the Rabbit Hole →
- Sour Grapes → Find on the shelf: Sour Grapes →
- Ten Step Nightlife Preparation Routine - G Manifesto → Find on the shelf: Ten Step Nightlife Preparation Routine - G Manifesto →
- The Century of the Self Series → Find on the shelf: The Century of the Self Series →
- Tiger → Find on the shelf: Tiger →
- What if you tried hard? - Aaron Francis → Find on the shelf: What if you tried hard? - Aaron Francis →
- When You Truly Work for Yourself → Find on the shelf: When You Truly Work for Yourself →
- Willingness to look stupid → Find on the shelf: Willingness to look stupid →